Thursday, July 11, 2024

Garden thoughts on flowers in full gladness glow Thursday morning now at 9:27am when I get ready to let flow my poem here!

 Await my poem , it is still to come soon! Tony 7/11/2024


                                                   I am ready now uncertain afraid as I am

                                                   Of only my own stupid hold-backs holding

                                                   Me as if I was only a pawn to be moved 

                                                  Against my will to accomplish that which

                                                  I purposely do not allow myself to see as I

                                                  Fall into old habits overthinking my past &

                                                 Losing track of the here and my own pow now

                                                 I have focused on my immediate as in my leis-

                                                 Ure pleasure and been distracted attracted away

                                                 Away not okay, yet I find I am as consternated 

                                                 Have been growing alerted more to my nd to

                                                 Now this these moments finish what I have so

                                                  Very much accomplished far thus which is a lot!




                                                I am giving, I always give, I want to please I 

                                                Forget myself in my giving and now I must so

                                               To myself start to give in deeds my acts my

                                               Moves my missions my missives my mights

                                               My gasps mine  grasps me and I glees glads so

                                               Inwards in disciplines in purposes in focuses

                                               They are all there for I have not been idle no!

                                               In my very own designed by me WAY have

                                               produced much to be very proud of in my own

                                               Way in silence in steadfast earnest podding so    

                                                Practiced unrehearsed uncharted groping way

                                                My gut has been my compass it has had the say

                                               It has judged my path once I have embarked &

                                               Tat only have I heeded, listened, accepted, felt

                                               Inside I out I sigh I sad I safe I see I sate I self

                                               Say to myself that my doings & I must be okay

                                               More than that I use forward & act out senses all

                                               Mine in my mark my bark my lark my arc tarp!

                                               I will find my sleep my slumber my lumber my

                                               Sun and light the next day dreaming alone ost

                                               My wandering asleep are lonely dark disturbed

                                               I need to assert myself more than ever to return

                                              To some happier night sleeping wanders as wander

                                               Lost and alone and miserably bereft they are so

                                               Very unsatisfied be they be I be unsatisfied sad

                                                I am so much better than all of that I so know!

                                                And now I take a break and start again soon

                                                I am so fortunate to know I do not deserve a

                                                An advantage a privilege 2 have a silver spoon!





                                                           I would rather be naked now and live
                                                          Without cloths whenever possible so
                                                          Comfortable at home outdoors with 
                                                           Others named, too, and yet the thought
                                                          Of being naked with some will be hard
                                                           For me to adjust to as of social norms
                                                           Jealousies and upsets caused by naked
                                                           Bodies and shame and fear and feelings
                                                            
                                                           Nowhere to hide and that self conscious 
                                                           I am not worried about that myself not
                                                           Really judge me as you certainly will
                                                           I will not hide  or takeO fort in social 
                                                           Customs and that suits me just fine! I
                                                           Must stand up for the naked man I am
                                                           For so long hidden behind loathing &
                                                           Ready to be seen by all naked as born
                                                            Let this now be our norm not porn not
                                                            Fearful or shameful or dirty it may be
                                                            A bit flirty we are all human should be
                                                            Loudful bareful skinful hairful proudful!
                                                            Come on down and strip away 2 nude!





                                                          The wall of silence moving forth the
                                                           Wrong audience the peops so few so
                                                            Lack of peeps & solace of bird and
                                                            Chipmunk scamps so tramps so yes
                                                             Brisk and swift crossings on deck
                                                             Solaced entertainment surrounded in
                                                             Sunlit colors abound around astound!
                                                             Helping that wall of empty e-space 
                                                             That plain that hill valley gorge ravine
                                                             Be it glaring to me ‘tween us and our 
                                                              Connections of understandings miss
                                                              Bliss piss fist grist hiss a real divide
                                                              That social norms easy pat we by abide
                                                              So easy to slip thus to into to harbor us
                                                              Painful communication so not really no
                                                              Empty fake false satisfactions an’t get
                                                              Where is my mic when I desperate 4 it
                                                               So now need I won’t at all plead no I
                                                               Resolute in mine quest proceed in a
                                                               Vacuum a void a vacuous volition so
                                                                Void annoyed toy’ed teased tested
                                                                Others off deployed I rest I turn I so
                                                               Struggle one lone alone muggle I
                                                               Want that touch some warmth 2 snuggle
                                                               That really should be no trouble Xcept
                                                               For our social mores that are really not
                                                               Social at all rather divisive up knot tie!
                                                               But I kick my butt I squeeze my nut i
                                                               Rely in much loneliness in mine gut!




Je suis , oui, je suis vivant , VRAIment meme heureux!
C’est bien lequatorze Juillet Dimanche! Je suis prete 
Pour bien apprecier ce jour la Bastille Day Jour oui oui!
Tout Va bien je suis dehors dans notre jardin avant de 
commencer Mon boulot au magasin des vins fins a
Washington DC 20008 a CLeveland Park quartier!
Joindre-moi , on peut marcher ensemble et partager
Nos experiencesensembles ou celebataire au fin des
Journees bien reussi pour nous a conus meme seule!
J’aime bien cette idea, est ce Que tu est bien d’accord?
Un verre de champagne Grand Cru pour bien celebrer?!





I am convoluted for sure yet clarifying by the day and night!
I have one foot in my job enabling wine enjoyment, and one 
Out flirting seriously with ar enabling my continuing on to now
Finish so much of what I have started! My job is largely done
Now with wine as I see and feel how so many have moved on
And no longer seek my advice and so it is time for me to turn my
Attentions to myself and my art pursuits which I love and live so
Furiously in disarray play dismay astray way way , sway sashay!

I am learning so much about myself as I turn inwards more with more 
Time to focus on my goals and dreams and paths so many so often so
Knocking constant at my door, at my window, I love my life so and feel
So privileged to be and to feel so alive now as rain drops start to fall on 
And hit the umbrella above me alerting e to the real possibility of much
More rain to soon fall from the skies as they are milked and given relief!
I am so blessed, I am such a mess, I have so much to still lean up, I have
So much to fundamentally yes seems like radically change and rearrange
In myself and my actions as to better grip that which I have courted and
Played with and followed and learned from in my doings and now it is
Time to gather and promote and organize and sell if possible those doings
So that they all find good homes, lodgings, places to be ,to shine to feel
Loved, appreciated, welcomed, better understood and experienced as we
All should, get those priorities gathered, outlined, dealt with, realized!
It is a gargantuan task that I chip steadily away at now all the time focused!

























































































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