I have lived and love and like, listen more, learn extra, suffer pains in not knowing, now realizing I was never meant to

I was called out to my face more / than once , he walked twenty / steps over ourcul-de-sac to say / our midnight walk in the dark / around their yard, at first they / did not us recognize - our dog / and me sniffing around forvred / fox and just the right spot to / poop was not cool! Said twice / thrice , I listened, said it / would never happen again and / now when walking make a wide //arc around to never again there / walk and have not since much said / my tesponse so cool and deliberate / i simply am cool even when not!

I drone on yes Idrone on my self entitling thrown not knowing, nowhere understanding I don’t faith the mold

i'm an utter selfpity cruiser sore loser No one have I let in choosing, so I thought my self-others-battles are purely all mine to sulk to envy and gather all togethefmy prise my demise my utter i position mine to laugh at, smirk at, laude so loudly yeah feeling thecwear wore tears tear utter cum- pleae quick NOW such despair! so ighty is my constant falling,mydroning on and on, my self spying unforgiving yes despising ! That con a constant darkening where lightening would so served me all the better to be unobstructed mypathmyvery own, and yet I set off many drones all in the mightynameto roam, to gather much- needed informations to plan myevery new forms. I am home on the phone I am played on my iPad there's no love out there, just that illusive deal promise a surface of blurry faced fakes faking their every gesture their empty faces those smiles as about sincere as liesrepeated to make me feel so athome and comfort alone Mygut saysotherwise, myin and out soooo about stincts X Y Z 2 A B C say don't this buy into I'll be your honey, we can later talk money Come to daddy, your momma needs you, we are family and our blood calls out our names it's only in our real pain that we live at all

All we care to feel, that we can feel is another’s pain in our own pai

we drain others , toss them out, abuse, gossip, believe their lies, we don't want to think, we do not know how to feel, we never have that been that taught, simply taut, never ever real as in relaxed, only taught or shown or pushd yes, to compete, to lick, to destroy, to rob and laugh at and gloat, to watch them try to reach as they cross the moat! the crocs will eat them, we will watch with an intentness that is purely mad, our glad that we get from their destruction , puts on pause our own pain! like a climax to willingly climb, we max max lose our grip our tracks, and consumed whole , for fractions of a split second, die or worse , we live that's all we have, we root for it, we slave others so we do not have to slave, at least at orfor that, brats we are, bitches, too, carved into, branded, molded, used - shoved to that - lowliest of lowest livings that render usinefectual, and in no danger of ever waking up from this trance a promised by them romance that was never EVER meant to be as instead

dead living was always the goal the aim of others for us!

inspired by the dress rehearsal rag in part, in part, by giving you what you want, if I sugar-coat IT it simply does not ring true!

Hurry - you have tomake that bus! you don't know it, but your butts are ours and will always slave and toil to please satisfy glorify US ! Chosen by us, for us, all about us, NEVER about you!

Brattish bullshishhhhh, robberish, stealing from all those you leave t be constantly poorish by you flagrant disrespectful controlish harmish alarmish cacaish killingish hiddenish WAYS!

YOU fool foul fill flip flush flaunt / YOU are brattish bratardish boys

/ Still in school in frats con otros / Brats , WORSE than rats! Your act / Act accumulate in your male pacts / Your flying LOW is lower than LOW / Your power addictions you abuse to / Maintain your high FIX as Broke so / Really lost sad lonely greeds are / Your tickets your pardons 2 stay / Yes 4everest in THE hole in holed / Down till death swallws you whole!

The way I met my day is like the way I am greeted by my day today only different 7/31/2025

I must persist in not yet perishing! I must insist 2 stay 2 say 2be counted My presence is still needed kneeded so I pay my way my own termed sperm way Day night I eGads some still eeeeeeee Tony it's sooooo Tony NOT 2 late mate!

They say is old hat today I say Theirs yesterday was not mine no Them invaded space often leaving I opt always focus with eyes mine The feat atmy bare feet challenges Mine me myself I must screen often Oft away aahh sway not swat but In mine own it soooo play I on out

I am sunk will follow most and skirt Them's tempTaTaTazeMeSooooooTayShawns They those them legs flowers flowing Bare naked ladies in tones of pink 2 Lavenders my salvayvaisVoomvroomTions! I am wiilingly lost 2 them all yes si Shrinking still i oohhhhh open flower Share ALLi got to simple yes naked be In their presence is a dream concumss Correct consent 2 BE me mine found so Finding myself wrapped in allthe hopes I will finfmy mine me myself carry in Transported on by with along in flight Fright our shared in our ways we own de- Delights together many screen bites sad Oui oui oui oui oui wee as I may shrunk

Keener spleener spinner shouldererer sooo my right, slept, keep wrongly company with two pillows last night, woke up sooo sore! Yeah sir , Madame, Quel bore! Waste of a good night”s snore! Happy Wednesday , June 4, 2025 at 7:57am as I start to type

I si slept all wrong! I got a sleep load of right shoulder What mishap, what a slather of stab The deep sleep compunded by mushap I had not a dither a dab an ounce of Awareness the pain was growing bloom doom after slumber's swoon to announce Itself in sharp stabbing knife edge a shoulder wedge pledge to make me awake Pay dearly for not knowing what I was Going tohave to soon pay for in darkness Abdin light for not sleeping right @night! knowing not the pain accruing sharp So soundasleep in growing pain ob- Live-I-ohhh-us : right shoulder and I got these inesall messed up! must Aycloserattention to my pne finger Tappingon this iPad keyboard yeah Just ad i must plan better smlumbers!

I still wearsome of,ast night's pain! Alleve has come tomost of my rescue! Thank God ess in that I believe fever strong fervent servant to goodness us!

poet Poe oohhh so et et tic tick ick slow not quick the I am muse mused fuse fucked flatter be menu but and include butt at @attered spit spat pat punt pattered so much so,nwhat? When? Why ?where ? Whathasreal eel eat ly mu mu maybe red!?

I am called yeah answer Answeredswervd sworn So much nudeness sex Sway squirt squint at my Age answer tgat page! Know raw rant real rage Iam calling my calling Myalling mybilling my I am alert a real flirt I resurrect myself as I Find solace digging in Tge dirt planting my yes Rose ofSharon's to grow Up tall and flower pretty Strong correct all wrong!l

Writing write-in write @, with tap , like pen-scratching surface screen without paper, the order , the cal, the direct as in dire-region-purpose-2-me-calm-BE this last day of April 30 as bird songs fill air and that reassuring hum of air-conditioning, sudden rattle off trash can lid hits the rim below it just now sounding gruff abrupt as that of airplane passing overhead drowns out that space and yet birdies tweet their messages clear crystal bright sounding just right! It’s nice says my wife!!

Writing is the order for Me of both my night & day SO : Here I go without

Any further pause - delay! it's the only game that i am Or want now toplay as it Suits me as suiting me Seems like the suit i am Now in this heat able to Carry withany assuredness That i will fulfill in taps Ofmy finger to right of my Right hand's big thumb in a Lovely tan from so much be- In this week's outside light And breezee and gusts of air And motions sounds actions Many pains groans sighs satis- Factions attractions duties Selfimposed by and large to with accomplishments fill up The space of each day and Night so that sleep I must Might fright ignite delight In plain view in my sights in!

I am a child still very much actively absorbing alive in high maintenance having trouble at times myself maintain my grounding growing grunting grudging straining paining joying fleeing newly found each second footing grip and foundation

I love how i an comprlled PROpelled not lapelled so OWNing my own darn mine BODY smell fresh out of MY is hell pell mell yes TODAY even more a hard sell AS i do not believe in snh SORT i wanna be a great good SPORT hard sell no no no no PLAYing the GAME is not my PATH be damned if I will br DOOMED to failure nooo WAY! HERE to stay 2 FULLy play! I AM a child of shiny skinned YOU will not guess -green FROGS leaping to stay!

There is a sickness of being

There is a sickness of being

That  cultivates us unbeknownst 

So that unknowing we innocent 

Cultivate back and that we come

Stupidly sadly wrongly embrace

With each deliberate scene

Ones that our beings create

As if in our waking dreams

We cannot get enough so

Drowning out our contacts

With real life unimagined

Also uninterrupted yes and

Told by media to us so very

Boring Quick adopt a person

Another’s persona so you

Will neither be singled out of

Stand out and examined com-

Mented demented furiously up-

Down-swing-bailed-beat-pounded 

Around ! Till you barely exist

So that there is barely of you 

Yes you - any trace ! They and 

You have sadly worked to erase!

Without any good notion of grace!

And yet we did it to ourselves in

Part so we would not ever be

Responsible to answer ever for

Anything that we might do on

Our part as that idea be so scary!

Snowing so peacefully NOW in PEACE we piece TOgetHerHimUSAllOfWE!

Loving this envelopment

Possible peaceful enduring

Us alluring resultyesmeant!

 Snow is peace soooo spend

Splendid calm in warmth 

Not harm so reason to be

Living in such alarm harm

Darn I love this snow now

It is my healing lucky charm

Livin’ on the farm sings the

Jefferson Airplane that Marty

Smarty wise Grace Jorma too

Plays they are our volunteers 

Of peace of patience of such

Gentle fiery firm working grace

Leading us all away from disgrace

That police use of crowns mace 

This snow is our peaceful awakening 

Alarm to arms and legs hand and

Feet ready to meet our calling

Now more than ever perhaps

In our life love like peace safe 

Productive not destructive powers.

I’m a delicate flower

 That is so strong indeed

So sweet as no smell

Can imagined but not

Be obvious to most that

Unaware will be lured

By surface to clap and

Stare when no flight

No stair no step is4

Then there, so vital

So firm the storms 

Sudden with notice 

None until that force

Of wind the burn of

Fire removes our homes

Our havens of dysfunction 

Those oasis’s by others by

To Us all be spoon.fed 

So many meds once not

Present but for greed for

Power that money-addict-

Addict in our weak frames 

Our vanities dumbnesses 

Our human frailnesses so

Preyed upon by so few to

Shackle spackle and to most

The world at large present

Once again images of peace

Where there there never was

Never ever will be until the

Lust if money no longer be

Addictions inflictions to all

Early drawings ( 9/6-7/1989’)!of mine from a long time ago I believe in the mid to late eighties!

 

Early drawings  ( 9/6-7/ 1989’)I made and meant to share awhile ago. Sharing now 2/5/2025

Well there’s no love between us

 I had it coming 

She had it coming

We had it coming

There was once a

Platonic love and

Then it got you know

Complicated 

I pressed myself

That I my wishes my

Wants my fantasy 

Fuck the novels 

I write my own so

One-sided my doom

My failing my down 

Down fall to even 

Have in my head 

Written any at all!

A big disservice I

So fucked  it up!

More for myself than

Her, but effects 

Affects us all! Don’t we know

it!?

Some more than others’

Tant pis!

I don’t like anything about you right now

 

I don’t like anything about you right now 

I am just sick of it all and perhaps so

Wrong and yet I feel intense dislike

Like I do not understand you at all

And yet I know I project myself so

Wrongly at you with no rights at all!

It is I in the wrong as you have never

Once let me on though I yearn burn

Bake quake quiver shiver to be led

Fed by you and so I spank my flank 

And again correct myself to just

Move on close this mind game

Chapter of mine, toss it in the bin

Burn it be done with it love myself

You know I know no foul no shame 

And yet for my thoughts and actions

I am riddled racked with disgust at

Myself! And yet I like nothing at

This very moment about you at all!

Dastardly male i am in all My gall!

Getting a real grip am I , moments to in revel at those revelations I am achieving through rummaging every day!

 

To be able to look with

In e my me all mine mi 

Self de-shelfed de-robed

I closer still X-mmm-am

Am in motives directives

Debunked bungles jungles

Side trips strips all times

Easy solution not really

But feels so good finger

Up my butt less damage

Psycho-lol-low-log-ick-

Lick later wounds that

Green cuke -sweat-stain

Drain sweeter ‘n coke so

Mine hits anal wall, push

No further membrain-brand

Not wanting break , no foul

No gain , gas-pass shit marks

Careful what you wish for

Best achieved in one’s head

Bend torso lower cock so

Mouth-receptive so stink so

Stun stunk soooo mmmmmm

Who’s ow the skunk!? All

My pent-up-male-cock-crazed

Gunk bunk trunk desperate

Measures glory holes and yes

Stalls at malls, gas stations

Shitty toilets panting shoving

Pricks frantic raw rough no

Disney coat no foto-shop-NO!

Temporary release from our

Own mental prisons solving

Absolutely nothing! Change

My habits! Turn in my keys

No longer to fit driving with

One hand my blood-stiff yes

Penis out of it will my jizz

So madly fiercely animal cum!

Feeling aggressively alive to grapple to grip and grope, rope and soap slippery slick slicing slope , my energy, my intensity,my natural capacities, capabilities, capricious cantankerous, compelling inclinations sooooooo darn spontaneous sooooooooooo noooooo slow!

 

All is sudden my souvenir trails

My savage returns such flames

So many thrustings by me so yeah

Sudden abunden pitch my tent dents!

Mess mire murk mystic mighty most

Blasting brimming combining collides 

Rides reddens denses tenses test tops

Tips I tap slap grap app apple slice so

Big bites crunch unch inching clear

Queer questing quiet turbulence to

Grasp to contest and confront to be

Myself so nude to myself hiding not

Napping freq freak frantic fresh fire

Flash flair flaunt fry flirt pull off shirt!

A long long along time coming! Fatigued by my restless dress mess to myself to me to us come4fessUndressReDIREerect!

 

     I am getting to know myself better and my ways that I worked before and, having time to reflect is wonderful.

I have charged forward all my life into everything I do once I make my move by jumping off without fear.

Fear will not stop me.

My own mind will not wall me in or wall me out

I must have flashes and glimmers y s

Of what I am all about

Neither you or they will lint my way

Like the Damon and the trout

Swim madly swiftly boldly

Into the mystic the electric

I am charged each morning

With tasks so grand so challenged

So questioned so indifferent

The world does not care

The world wants to hate

To blame anything but them

Blinded by their failures to

Simply be themselves to do

That which makes them happy

Their brains bursting fuses

Synapses fizzling out and dying

Time my friends for you and I

To bite our bullets hard and let

That fucked-up past be sawed off

Like in times of past wars we must 

Finally pay our pipers and smile 

Along long long time coming 2 us

 Anthony Tony Quinn

Tuesday 10:46am

January 28, 2025

To write is right whether poetry or not’

 

I love to write and use words and not emojis 

Emojis will destroy our desire and patience and abilities to write , and effect our thinking, too

As we give up much

Lose ourselves 

Become more pampered and spoiled 

Useless to ourselves

And pawns to the few 

Manipulating us!

I give IT all I got!

I fo it to reach out, to release positive energy, to encourage both myself and others 

Whether what I write is poetry or not on some level it feels right to me!

SO:

I write on

Just about synth

Any surface 

Any scrap

I love recycling 

Refurbishing 

Putting my mark 

On!

Friday night 

January 23

2025

Anthony Alan Quinn 

Cheers!